sms , shaayri, jokes , poor comments and PJs

Ek ladki thi diwani si
Ek ladki thi diwani si, sunder si lambi si,
Nazrein jhukake sharmake galion se guzra karti thi
Latak matak chalti thi, aur kaha karti thi,
Bartan Lelo Bartan....

Vo aaj bhi hume dekh kar muskurate hain
Vo aaj bhi hume dekh kar muskurate hain
Yeh to unke bachche hee kaminey hain,
Jo Mama Mama kehke bulaate hain :)

Shaam hote hi ye Dil udaas hota hai
Toote khwaboo ke siwa kuch na pass hota hai
Tumahri yaad aise waqt bohat aati hai
Bandar jab koi aas-paas hota hai..

Dekha tujhe to rooh khush ho gayi,
Ek kami thi vo bhi puri ho gayi,
Pagal hain vo log jo kehte hain ki,
Chimpanzi ki aakhri nasal kahin kho gayi!!

Do you know ????
"A" "B" "C" "D" - The first four alphabetic words do not appear in spelling from 1 to 99
They start with :
"A" IN "THOUSAND" "B" IN "BILLION" "C" IN "CRORE" "D" IN "HUNDRED"

Gharwali V/s Bharwali

Gharwali : Suntay ho ji varna, may ghar chodkay mayakay
chali jaaongi !!!!!!!!!!!!
Bharwali : Suntay ho ji varna, may maykaa chodakay aapkay
ghar aa jaaongi !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

A young man was so paranoid about the size of his little tool that he could never work up the courage to have sex. Then one day he fell in love with a nurse. They got married, Totally scared, he told her of his problem.

"Don't worry," She said. I won't laugh." Blushing the man drops his trousers. "It's OK," she said. "I've seen lots smaller than that."

"Really?" the relieved man asked. She nodded. "Yes," she chuckled, "I used to work in the maternity unit."

Choosing career is like choosing Wife
from Ten Girl friends !!! Even you pick most ... beautiful intelligent gorgeous sexy hot ..................
"
"there is still pain of loosing Nine !!!!!!!!!!

Teacher : What do you wish to do in future ???
Sunil : IT Professional Anil : Pilot Ravi : Politician
Shikha : Good Mother

Rahul : I will help Shikha !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Ali Baba Aur 40 Chor

We all have heard this till date. But for your kind information..
From 01.12.2008 : Ali Baba Aur 30 Chor
Do you Know why ?? Where are the Ten ??
"
"
"
"
Recession baba, Job cutting,
Economy meltdown !!!!!!!!!!!

Faithful husbands will go straight to heaven
Because they have already gone thru hell !!!!

Husband: darling tum pepsi ki tarah ho jitna piyun aur maza aata hai
Wife: hubby tum slice ki tarah ho jab maza aanay lagta hai khatam ho jata hai !!!!!

How to keep your wife safe, if your job is touring, you are away from house most of the time ??
Just tell ur Friends .... I am suffering from AIDS

Santa ki ladai apnay baap say ho gai, usne khunnas me kya kiya hoga ????

Socho !!!!!!!!!!!!
baap ki photo kabristan may ek ped
pay latka di, aur nichay likha ....... "COMING SOON"

Real Shaadi.com profiles....read on

Ultimate.... ........ ....I bet u can't stop laughing.

These are Girls profiles taken from shaadi . com These are actual ads on a matrimony site. Grammar and
spelling errors have no place in a profile description as everything is straight from the heart!

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- Hello To Viewers My Name is Sowmya , I am single i dont have male,If any one whant to marrie to me u can visite to my
home. I am not a good education but i working all field in bangalore.. if u like me u welcome to my heart...
when ever u whant to meet pls visit my resident or
send u letter..
Thanks
yours Regards Sowmya ~*~
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i want very simple boy. from brahmin educated family from Orissa state she is also know about RAMAYAN, GEETA BHAGABATA, and other homework
(Wut Homework?)
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I am a happy-go-lucky kind of person. Enjoys every moments of life. I love to make friendship. Becauese friendship is a
first step of love. I am looking for my dreamboy who will love me more than i.
Because i love myself a lot. If u think that is u then why to late come on ........hold my hand forever !!!
(The dilwale dulhaniya effect)
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i am simple girl. I have lot of problemin my life because of my lucknow i am looking one boy he care me
and love me lot lot lot
(I don't know why but this is one of my favorites)
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i want a boy with no drinks if he wants he can wear jeans in house but while steping out of house he should give recpect to our cast
(by not wearing his jeans? Wat the hell...)
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HYE I AM A GOOD LOKING GIRL,WHO HAS THE CAPABILITY TO MAKE ANY BODY TO LOUGH.I BELIEVE IN GOD AND ACCORDING TO ME FRIENDS ARE THE REAL MESSENGER OF GOD. THE 3 THINGS I AM LOOKING FROM A BOY
,THEY ARE
1.THEY MUST BELIEVE IN GOD.
2.. THEY HAVE TO LIKE MY PROFFESION
3. THEY SHOULD NOT GET BORED WITH ME WHEN I WILL TRY
TO MAKE THEM LOUGH.
(all of us are loughing {laughing})
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whatever he may be but he should feel that he is going to be someone groom and he must think of the future life if he is toolike this he would be called the man of the lamp
(I am clueless, I feel so lost. Can anyone tell me what this girl wants)
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i love my patner i marriage the patner ok i search my patner and I love the patner ok thik hai the patner has a graduate
ok
(I am again clueless but I liked the use of "ok". The person is suffering from "Ok-syndrome")
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iam pranati my family histoy my two brother two sister and father & mother sister completely married
(somebody please explain in comments section how to get married 'completely' ?)
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my name is farhanbegum and i am unmarried. pleaes you marrige me pleaes pleaes pleaes pleaes pleaes pleaes pleaes
(height of desperation! J )
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iam kanandevi. i do owo businas.one sistar.he was marred.
(No comments)
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hello i am a good charactarised woman. i want to run my life happily. i divorced my first husband. his charactor is not good'.
i expect the good minded and clean habits boy who may be in the same caste or other caste accepted ...
(but credit cards not accepted..?? ?)
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Iam Sharmila my colour is black, but my heart is white. i like social service.
(Zebra..???)
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the psychiatrist replied: "Move over!"

Married to grandmother

A psychiatrist visited a California mental institution and asked a patient, "How did you get here? What was the nature of your illness?" He got the following reply.

"Well, it all started when I got married and I guess I should never have done it. I married a widow with a grown daughter who then became my stepdaughter.

My dad came to visit us, fell in love with my lovely stepdaughter, then married her. And so my stepdaughter was now my stepmother. Soon, my wife had a son who was, of course, my daddy's brother-in-law since he is the half-brother of my stepdaughter, who is now, of course, my daddy's wife.

So, as I told you, when my stepdaughter married my daddy, she was at once my stepmother! Now, since my new son is brother to my stepmother, he also became my uncle. As you know, my wife is my step-grandmother since she is my stepmother's mother. Don't forget that my stepmother is my stepdaughter. Remember, too, that I am my wife's grandson.

But hold on just a few minutes more. You see, since I'm married to my step-grandmother, I am not only the wife's grandson and her hubby, but I am also my own grandfather. Now can you understand how I got put in this place?"

After staring blanky with a dizzy look on his face, the psychiatrist replied: "Move over!"

Do Americans really need it ??

42 Tons of Aspirin is cosumed in a day In America

Thats how good men are ???

Who says our English is teruk.? Just see below - Ours is simple, short, concise, straight-to- point, effective etc........

WHEN GIVING A CUSTOMER BAD NEWS
Britons: I'm sorry, Sir, but we don't seem to have the sweater you want in your size, but if you give me a moment, I can call the other outlets for you.
Asian : No Stock.

RETURNING A CALL
Britons: Hello, this is John Smith. Did anyone page for me a few moments ago?
Asian : Hello, who page?

ASKING SOMEONE TO MAKE WAY .
Britons: Excuse me, I'd like to get by. Would you please make way?
Asian : S-kew me

WHEN SOMEONE OFFERS TO PAY
Britons: Hey, put your wallet away, this drink is on me.
Asian : No-need, lah.

WHEN ASKING FOR PERMISSION
Britons: Excuse me, but do you think it would be possible for me to enter through this door?
Asian : (pointing the door) can AR?

WHEN ENTERTAINING
Britons: Please make yourself right at home.
Asian : Don't be shy, lah!

WHEN DOUBTING SOMEONE
Britons: I don't recall you giving me the money.
Asian : Where got?

WHEN DECLINING AN OFFER
Britons: I'd prefer not to do that, if you don't mind.
Asian : Don't want la...

IN DISAGREEING ON A TOPIC OF DISCUSSION
Britons: Err. Tom, I have to stop you there. I understand where you're coming from, but I really have to disagree with what you said about the issue.
Asian : You mad, ah?

WHEN ASKING SOMEONE TO LOWER THEIR VOICE.
Britons: Excuse me, but could you please ! Lower your voice, I'm trying to concentrate over here.
Asian : Shut up lah!

WHEN ASKING SOMEONE IF HE/SHE KNOWS YOU.
Britons: Excuse me, but I noticed you staring at me for some time. Do I know you?
Asian : See what, see what?

WHEN ASSESSING A TIGHT SITUATION.
Britons: We seem to be in a bit of a predicament at the moment.
Asian : Die-lah!!

WHEN TRYING TO FIND OUT WHAT HAD HAPPENED
Britons: Will someone tell me what has just happened?
Asian : Wat happen Why like that....

WHEN SOME ONE DID SOMETHING WRONG
Britons: This isn't the way to do it here let me show you,
Asian : like that also don't know how to do!!!!

WHEN ONE IS ANGRY
Britons: Would you mind not disturbing me
Asian : Celaka u

Often Husband & wife fight with each other

Often Husband & wife fight with each other

Please see the atmosphere, surroundings,

Place, nature, situation, before doing so :

A couple were fighting in the car

See the result is below :